Habit is the force that ties Augustine to his worldly life of sins, even when he wants to try to leave it, and Augustine specifically associates this force of habit with the idea of original sin, inherited from Adam.īiblical echoes also inform Augustine's description. Echoes of Book 6, with its themes of giving up bad habits after hearing pertinent advice from a wise friend, are also apparent, both here and in the story of Victorinus, who was moved to convert publicly on the advice of Simplicianus. Furthermore, both Antony and Ponticianus' unnamed friends are moved to give up the world after reading a crucial passage, just as Augustine finally is. Antony's example of personal purity and withdrawal from the world has obvious connections to Augustine's situation. God allowed Satan to tempt Antony in several visions, but Antony withstood all temptations. After reading Christ's exhortation to "sell all you have" in Matthew 19:21, Antony sold all of his family's estate, gave the proceeds to the poor, and retired to the desert as a hermit, eating little and praying constantly. In a culture that valued asceticism, Antony was an exemplary model of self-denial. Antony of the Desert, provides the backdrop for the conversion of Ponticianus' friend and of Augustine, although Augustine does not supply the details for his readers. The second story, the one about Ponticianus' friends, immediately precedes the conversion episode. The story of Victorinus, the converted rhetor, appears in the first part of Book 8, although you are not certain from Augustine's description how much time separates his hearing of that story from his conversion experience. The conversion episode is foreshadowed in Book 8 by two stories that mirror Augustine's experience. (Incidentally, readers puzzled by Augustine's insistence on a life of complete continence need only look at the other examples in this chapter and Chapter 9 for a cultural context: The fiancées of two converted men immediately join them in dedicating their virginity to God Verecundus is disappointed that he cannot withdraw from the world because he is married and Alypius shows his self-denial by walking around barefoot all winter.) The "take and read" episode is the catalyst for decisive change in Augustine's life. Intellectually, he has been prepared for this moment for some time, and emotionally, he has been in a state of steadily growing anxiety. In a way, it is almost a fairy-tale ending: Augustine has been desperately looking for certainty his entire spiritual life, and here, in one moment of clarity, he gets the relief that only absolute certainty can give him. In a moment of intense emotional crisis, Augustine hears a mysterious child's voice chanting, "Take and read, take and read." When he does so, he encounters Romans 13:13-14, and the passage abruptly lays to rest all his doubts and fears about leaving his old life behind. He resolves to dedicate his entire life to God, and Alypius joins him in this resolve.Īugustine's final conversion at the end of Book 8 is the most famous episode from the Confessions. Paul and reads a passage that puts his mind at rest. He hears a voice saying, "Take and read." Interpreting this as a message from God, he picks up his copy of the letters of St. Augustine breaks down in tears beneath a fig tree. His will is divided, but Augustine observes that both contrary wills were his own, not a good will and a bad will, as the Manichees believe. Extremely agitated, Augustine retreats to the garden of their house. Augustine is overcome with shame at his inability to follow their example. Ponticianus then tells them about two of his friends who were inspired to dedicate their lives to Christ after reading the story of St. Augustine and Alypius are visited by Ponticianus, who tells them about St. He is deeply distressed, therefore, that he cannot leave his old life now that he no longer has any doubts about Christianity. Augustine is moved by the story of Victorinus, but his old life has become a habit he cannot break.
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